Phew! I had a tough day yesterday. I was struggling with some pretty tough emotions and then some physical and mental tiredness just overwhelmed me.

Let's take a step back. The kids came over yesterday and we welcomed Carmen back from a week away in Wales (staying in dorm's and eating camp food). She had a good climbing mountains and going for hikes. I had a gammon in the freezer and wanted to do a lunch in the conservatory. So we had roast potatoe, carrots, spinach and gammon. It was a good meal.

That was the easy part. The bit I can't explain is the emotional turmoil I was having. It was sparked off by ordinary people singing (TV program) . This just pushed me over the edge. I can't sing ,well I can't even talk properly. You know it really got to me. Wham! Like a blow between the eyes. The total and helplessness of this injury just struck me. Sure, I've been here before for different reasons. Some for heavy stuff, like walking or driving a car.The difference is, to sing for me is about my heart. My heart sings and my mouth repeats. My heart can't sing without my mouth. So I wept. Sitting there alone in my kitchen I wept tears of pain. The pain of a silenced heart.

So, what more can I say...

Its Carmen's Birthday tomorrow. I have finished my preparing. The girls will stay tomorrow night as Alex has cricket.