I was so encouraged by the comments in the last entry. Thanks all!

Let me tell you about the last few days. (What I can make sense of, at any rate.. ) Well I have been at my worst level of illness since leaving hospital 2 years ago. In fact, yesterday I was so bad I stayed in bed for the day. I haven't done this for ages, because I hate lying in bed. So unable to sleep for days now I hoped to catch up. No such luck! I just lay there like the last few nights, alternating between hot and cold and sneezing.

On top of this I have had temporary carers. Trying to direct my care and think about the appropriate treatment for my cold whilst weak, disheartened and exhausted was hard to do. This is the price for living alone and being so independent.

I am due to go into meeting with HR in the next few days. I think it's my final meeting (by the tone of the letter). I am disappointed by the sourness. I have always been a faithfull employee and my cautiousness and nervousness has been met by suspicion and resentment. I have accepted my redundancy and simply wish to proceed carefully.