Dreary day. Overcast and cold. I had my children over last night. The last few weeks have been a mixture of rush and work and apathy.
I don't really know what to write. I normally use the blog to talk about my life in a wheelchair, the purpose being to keep my friends and family up to date and to provide an insight and record of the experience. In many ways I don't perceive myself as a disabled person and will often feel like I am just observing. This bizarre situation is part of the experience from highly active independence to disabled dependence.
Recently I was informed by someone I hold in high regard that I am self-obsessed. Admittedly the comment did come at a time of conflict,but it threw me off my stride. This was an indication of the significance of the remark. Have I become self obsessed and inward. Are my needs more important than others? I knew I had to solve this question, for I do not wish to be like this.
I cannot honestly say that I am not selfish and do keep certain treats aside for my pleasure but I do not accept the charge of being self obsessed. I am far too aware of the needs and feelings of others. I don't know if you have a view on this. Those that know me and those who don't; tell me your opinions.
3 comments:
Self-Obsessed! When I come to think of it, aren't we all "self-obsessed"? Who is more important in my life than ME? We all have our "disabilities" as well and probably use them as a crutch sub-consciously.
If you can be of help to just one person be it to build them up mentally or whatever, you will have achieved so much. Your awareness of others needs is truly a gift that not many of us have. Don't let it go!
There is always a door to be opened no matter what situation we find ourselves in and it is up to us to open that door.
It's a difficult thing giving advice! I think it's okay to do so when one has the other person's best interests at heart and gives the advice in a caring manner. Although personally speaking, I don't take well to advice given, especially when it's not what I want to hear!! I wonder in what tone of voice your advice was given?! It was quite some advice given! From reading your blog, I have never gotten the impression from what you write that you are self-obsessed.
A little story to share with you ... I have a friend who has a brain tumour. She is no longer able to work as she has headaches almost constantly and is not well most of the time. When I phone to chat to her, she often relates to me how terrible her weeks have been, how she just wishes that a solution could be found, and also updates me on research she's done, etc. I listen to everything she has to say .... because I am interested, because I care about her and because I know that it is important to her. Besides, we all need a sounding board now and again and to express what's on our minds/important to us. Now I would never, ever dream of calling her self-obsessed. So having said all that, you are allowed to be a little self-obsessed without you being any different to anyone else! Hope my comments help a bit!
Self-obsessed NO, highly individual YES, worthy friendship before, and now, and always, ABSOLUTELY
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