Stoke Mandeville Hospital Day 10
The day has drawn to a quiet close. The echo of voices and the whooshing sound of powered wheelchairs is the only sound in my room at end of the ward. As i put on some soft jazz I drift into a state of melancholy contemplation.
I realise I not in a happy state but I am open to the feelings and thoughts which wander aimlessly around in my mind. Since Tuesday I have had no voice and I have withdrawn from interaction. Normally an extrovert with gregarious tendency, I never put myself into positions where the quiet inner voice can be heard. Somehow I like it. I am alone in this place but I am not lonely.
This feeling was my experience quite regularly when I spent a year in Antarctica. It is such a magnificent and expansive place that one simply has to be alone to to think while you absorb your surroundings.
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| Overlooking the bukta (frozen sea salient) |
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| The midnight sun just returning after winter. |
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| Baby icebergs trapped by sea ice |
This week I had a series of injections in my neck and biceps to reduce the level of activity in them. This may seem strange namely to paralyse a paralysed man even further. However, if muscles are over active they can mask other movement or just distort the body. The injection is a controlled dose of botulinum toxin, botox, when injected deep into the muscle it goes to work poisoning the are so after a few days the muscle becomes paralysed. I haven't reached that stage yet.
1 comment:
I think it is a very bad idea to be injecting yourself with such poisons.
I don't see how this could help at all.
I can see why you would want to relax the muscles but to poison them?
Glad you were alone but not lonely.
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