Monday, November 07, 2005

Shatterred Dreams

My life is a mess.Littered with mistakes and useless dreams. The best relationships in my life, are the ones that don't depend on me.Talk about being afraid of commitment, I am so afraid to let others down, I keep everyone nicely seperate from the clutter. I am so sure that I will see them all dissolve away, like cats during fireworks. Never have I been insecure or dependent, now I am so sure of the importance of being "strong" even to fail to return a call or reciprocate any action. Is this any good for me?I don't know it's too ingrained now and anyway I can't test it because I think it's true.

I am at my home office desk it's just finished lunch. I don't eat lunch so I used the time to prepare my Christmas list for the kids.

This morning my car went in to have the fuel tank repaired. I also had a visit from some guys to do with renovation to my bathroom and hoist.I might be able to get a hoist to allow me to start walking!

Well back to work.

Ciao

No comments: